Quarantine life can be pretty monotonous. A few people have asked us "How is Korea?" and frankly we are in no position to answer that. I can say that the highway from the airport was most definitely a highway and seeing the islands poking out of Gyeonggi bay from Incheon airport are nice to look at. Seoul has a mountain and our school is close to it. There are some lovely Japanese maple trees outside our balcony and on sunny days we can sit there and get approximately 1m of sunshine from 10am - 1pm. By now our jet lag has more-or-less worn off but we are still trying to go to bed around 10pm and wake up around 7am. We had a pretty sizable grocery order delivered so we can make coffee and have meals at our own leisure.
While we are in quarantine, we have goals we are trying to achieve:
While we are in quarantine, we have goals we are trying to achieve:
It definitely helps the days pass quicker and gives us something to do and stay out of each other's hair. It also keeps us from lying on the couch, drinking wine and watching Netflix all day. We are attempting a HEALTHY QUARANTINE here people! We are exercising. We are eating VEGETABLES. We are using whitening strips. What else do we have to do? This idea is the genius of my beautiful and loving wife Karla. This is the story of how I was able to hitch my wagon to her rocketcar.
If you like it then you better put a ring on it
Karla and I met on the first day of orientation at the International School of Beijing in August 2016. She showed up LATE, a fact that I love to bring up and causes her mild embarrassment. She missed her best friend's wedding and was late because she was finishing her Masters of Art program, but I am petty and I need every advantage I can get on her. She was still late! Despite this she was only late a few hours and showed up in the evening of the first day.
It was a social event after a day of learning about systems at ISB. She hates being late and came in full force, fighting through her jet lag like the little trooper she is. I was chatting with some other new hires and she walked up to us and introduced herself in her typically charming matter. In my head she approached us because of my rugged good looks but it very well could have been because of the cheese plate and bottle of wine our group was sharing (remember sharing?). As we were two of the few young and single new hires there was some immediate recognition because of the new faculty yearbooks we were given. I had to admit, she was cuter in person.
The first week of the school had Elementary teachers learning about Elementary things and because we were both in that section we became pretty much inseparable along with our new Aussie friends Andy and Sally. We spent a lot of time shootin' the breeze and flirting during those two weeks of orientation, though because I was only hired on a part-time basis (opposed to her full-time two year contract) I was extremely hesitant to get into any kind of relationship with a co-worker. Teachers gossip just as much, if not more, than students in school. I had been working and living at a smaller school in Beijing for the two years previous and had a lot of established friendships outside work. However, she was the new girl in town so I offered to show her a bit of the city so she could get her bearings. Our work organized different socializing events after one of which I invited Karla and a few other colleagues to my local watering hole. We danced and played games throughout the night and it became clear that something beyond a work friendship was blossoming. I didn't want this to happen and tried really hard for the next few weeks to stay away from her so as not to jeopardize my position at the school.
I failed.
It was a social event after a day of learning about systems at ISB. She hates being late and came in full force, fighting through her jet lag like the little trooper she is. I was chatting with some other new hires and she walked up to us and introduced herself in her typically charming matter. In my head she approached us because of my rugged good looks but it very well could have been because of the cheese plate and bottle of wine our group was sharing (remember sharing?). As we were two of the few young and single new hires there was some immediate recognition because of the new faculty yearbooks we were given. I had to admit, she was cuter in person.
The first week of the school had Elementary teachers learning about Elementary things and because we were both in that section we became pretty much inseparable along with our new Aussie friends Andy and Sally. We spent a lot of time shootin' the breeze and flirting during those two weeks of orientation, though because I was only hired on a part-time basis (opposed to her full-time two year contract) I was extremely hesitant to get into any kind of relationship with a co-worker. Teachers gossip just as much, if not more, than students in school. I had been working and living at a smaller school in Beijing for the two years previous and had a lot of established friendships outside work. However, she was the new girl in town so I offered to show her a bit of the city so she could get her bearings. Our work organized different socializing events after one of which I invited Karla and a few other colleagues to my local watering hole. We danced and played games throughout the night and it became clear that something beyond a work friendship was blossoming. I didn't want this to happen and tried really hard for the next few weeks to stay away from her so as not to jeopardize my position at the school.
I failed.
By mid-October Karla had gotten wise to my avoidance and rightly called me out on it. By December I considered Karla my girlfriend and by February Karla finally came around to the idea that I was her boyfriend. That first school year together we were probably ISB's worst kept secret. I felt like I was being all sneaky-like bringing treats to her classroom but sooner than later the facade had crumbled. That summer I had invited myself along to travel to Greece to meet her friends (where she was working for the previous 4 years) and even to her parents house in Virginia for the week of her birthday. It went well and I got along famously with her family and things progressed from there.
Flash Forward to December 2018
We moved in to an incredible apartment (RIP we miss you!!!) in November 2018 and found that we lived together remarkably well. Other couples warned us about the petty arguments had over dirty dishes, how to decide where things go and preferred side of the bed but our strengths compliment each other very well. Karla is an artist and an empty apartment is her muse. She loves to draft sketches of rooms, measure things, decide how color compliments furniture and create intricate plans about how things are to be designed. While I certainly have an opinion of what looks good and what doesn't, my greatest strength in this aspect of our relationship is the ability to enthusiastically declare "I love it!!" and keep my nose out of business that doesn't concern me.
We also started discussing when, where and how we were going to get married. When you know you know. Karla being Karla, she began to research venues. Me being me, I wanted to ask for permission from her parents in person. I didn't do this very tactfully or with the confidence and bravado I had hoped. During the one week of Christmas break I was in Virginia, Karla had set up several appointments to check out wedding venues ("it's the only time we are free to do it!"). Keeping in mind that I had not proposed nor had I bought a ring yet. With father Tom in the room, I was helping Karla's mom Elaine with some computer troubleshooting when she asked me if there was any way she could repay my kindness. I clumsily joked "you could give me your daughter's hand in marriage". Typically, Tom chuckled and started walking out of the room but Elaine realized I was being serious. After letting them in on the news, now the whole family was in on the planning of venues; when, where and how. While I was on Team Elopement, my ideas were shot down pretty quickly and I realized that I was outnumbered and came around to the idea of a Virginian wedding (remember what I said about keeping my nose out of business that doesn't concern me).
We "got a great deal" on one of the venues we had looked at and the date was set: we were getting married on July 6, 2019. Now, to propose.
We also started discussing when, where and how we were going to get married. When you know you know. Karla being Karla, she began to research venues. Me being me, I wanted to ask for permission from her parents in person. I didn't do this very tactfully or with the confidence and bravado I had hoped. During the one week of Christmas break I was in Virginia, Karla had set up several appointments to check out wedding venues ("it's the only time we are free to do it!"). Keeping in mind that I had not proposed nor had I bought a ring yet. With father Tom in the room, I was helping Karla's mom Elaine with some computer troubleshooting when she asked me if there was any way she could repay my kindness. I clumsily joked "you could give me your daughter's hand in marriage". Typically, Tom chuckled and started walking out of the room but Elaine realized I was being serious. After letting them in on the news, now the whole family was in on the planning of venues; when, where and how. While I was on Team Elopement, my ideas were shot down pretty quickly and I realized that I was outnumbered and came around to the idea of a Virginian wedding (remember what I said about keeping my nose out of business that doesn't concern me).
We "got a great deal" on one of the venues we had looked at and the date was set: we were getting married on July 6, 2019. Now, to propose.
I still did not have a ring. Luckily, Karla had a plan for that too. I was adamant that I would be in charge of buying and designing Karla's ring but time was of the essence. During that Christmas visit to Virginia, Karla had prepared for me an embarrassingly long powerpoint that detailed what she did and did NOT like in engagement ring. I mentioned she loves design. And this would be on her finger forever so naturally she had some opinions. I decided to amalgamate several of her ideas and design something that did not already exist. In secret, I got to work on contacting custom jewelry makers on Etsy to make what I had in mind; the problem was it had to be shipped from the US. After several exchanges between myself and the designer, with feedback from my colleague who is a self-proclaimed diamond ring expert (you the best, Jo!) I had Karla's ring shipped through another friend with access to secure US Embassy mail. Karla was getting anxious. She was visiting jewelry stores and I was under the gun.
The 5th Annual Beijing International Pond Hockey tournament was held on January 19th in Gubei Water Town, which sits under the Great Wall of China. This is an incredibly unique tournament organized by my friend Curtis Dracz where participants get dressed up and play hockey outside. Curt and his team went above and beyond this year to get permission to play in Gubei Water Town and Karla accompanied me to the event. This still being a hockey tournament things may have gotten out of hand on Friday night but luckily Karla loves me and understood that this was a fun event. Our team's partners enjoyed exploring the town while we played, and all in all this was a rousing success.
For Beijing in the winter, Sunday was uncharacteristically sunny day and buses were organized to bring everyone back to the city. Karla and I decided to stick around so we'd have a slower Sunday Funday (our favourite day of the week) and could take a hike up the Great Wall to enjoy the sights and recover with the fresh air. At the last minute our friend Ellie asked if she could join us and we quickly said yes. The more the merrier! We spent the morning having a slow breakfast and lounging around the hotel before the three of us hiked up to the Wall. Throughout the hike we were talking with Ellie about her relationship with our good friend Clarky and their hesitance to say the "L word" to each other. Karla and I shared our personal story about how we delayed our relationship but once the truth came out we could not believe how long it took us to admit our feelings for one another. In that moment in the hike, I realized that I had a perfect opportunity on my hands. While I still didn't have the ring, it was a beautiful day, we were in an iconic setting and lo and behold I had a photographer with me. When I realized what I was about to do my body began to shake but as I expressed to Ellie "there is no time like the present!"
I had decided what I was going to do but not what I was going to say and after spending a couple minutes mulling about at the top I asked Ellie to take a photo of us. I began my odd, rambling speech about how much I loved her and how I wanted to provide her the life she wanted and Ellie, being an intuitive genius, switched to video. She captured the proposal and Karla dancing into my arms. I was afraid she would fall off but despite us both being layered in winter clothes and me in sweatpants the moment could not have been better. I can't upload the video here but I can upload this screenshot:
I had decided what I was going to do but not what I was going to say and after spending a couple minutes mulling about at the top I asked Ellie to take a photo of us. I began my odd, rambling speech about how much I loved her and how I wanted to provide her the life she wanted and Ellie, being an intuitive genius, switched to video. She captured the proposal and Karla dancing into my arms. I was afraid she would fall off but despite us both being layered in winter clothes and me in sweatpants the moment could not have been better. I can't upload the video here but I can upload this screenshot:
No time Like the Present
Despite her saying yes I got down on one knee and proposed two more times after this, both in her classroom at school. Once when I presented her with the "practice" ring that I was planning on proposing with and then finally with the real thing. These proposals were slightly less thrilling but she my wife does love being showered with gifts and affection.
Karla spent the next six months painstakingly drafting sketches of rooms, measuring things, deciding how light and color compliment a wedding dress and creating intricate plans about how things were to be designed for our wedding. Can you guess that I LOVED it ALL!? Because I love her. It was a stressful time but it was all worth it at the end because everything went perfectly and I got to marry her. It was definitely not without a thousand emails to our wedding planner and the help of Karla's amazing family, but our guests gave our wedding rave reviews. If you were there we hope you had fun. If you weren't there, we totally wish you could have been there (weddings are expensive, yo)!
One Love.
(post script: the proposal did inspire Ellie to tell Clarky how she felt and two years later they are now engaged! We are so happy for them - congratulations!)
Karla spent the next six months painstakingly drafting sketches of rooms, measuring things, deciding how light and color compliment a wedding dress and creating intricate plans about how things were to be designed for our wedding. Can you guess that I LOVED it ALL!? Because I love her. It was a stressful time but it was all worth it at the end because everything went perfectly and I got to marry her. It was definitely not without a thousand emails to our wedding planner and the help of Karla's amazing family, but our guests gave our wedding rave reviews. If you were there we hope you had fun. If you weren't there, we totally wish you could have been there (weddings are expensive, yo)!
One Love.
(post script: the proposal did inspire Ellie to tell Clarky how she felt and two years later they are now engaged! We are so happy for them - congratulations!)